"We're Saving Marriages Everybody!"
On today's show, we have Ron and Trixie, a young married couple whose relationship has become strained. Surprises are in store, and be on the lookout for our head of security Hammer keeping the peace between the two feuding love birds.
HERE
Showing posts with label idiots. Show all posts
Showing posts with label idiots. Show all posts
Friday, July 2, 2010
Monday, May 17, 2010
Podcast 11 - Meet The Aristocrats
This one might not make a whole lot of sense to people who haven't seen THE MOVIE or who aren't professional stand-up comedians, so if you don't fall into either camp, read about it HERE.
In short, there's this joke called "The Aristocrats". It's not all that funny, unless you're seriously twisted (I find it hilarious); but it is incredibly dirty (in fact, the nastier, more disgusting, more perverse, the better).
Here we have three drunks giving it their best shot; we meant to do this months ago, but unfortunately couldn't all get together until last Friday night. Here's J.D., Troy, and yours truly giving it our best shots (full disclosure: I wrote mine out well ahead of time - going against the entire spirit of the joke, being improvisation and spontaneity - and read it practically verbatim because I was beyond hammered):
J.D.'s HERE
Troy's HERE
Mine HERE
In short, there's this joke called "The Aristocrats". It's not all that funny, unless you're seriously twisted (I find it hilarious); but it is incredibly dirty (in fact, the nastier, more disgusting, more perverse, the better).
Here we have three drunks giving it their best shot; we meant to do this months ago, but unfortunately couldn't all get together until last Friday night. Here's J.D., Troy, and yours truly giving it our best shots (full disclosure: I wrote mine out well ahead of time - going against the entire spirit of the joke, being improvisation and spontaneity - and read it practically verbatim because I was beyond hammered):
J.D.'s HERE
Troy's HERE
Mine HERE
Saturday, February 6, 2010
Lost Podcasts: Insensitive Jokes
Saturday, January 30, 2010
Audible Expletive!
No one's ever going to confuse us with competent rappers like Vanilla Ice or Skee-Lo, but I'm not gonna lie to you, the first song isn't NEARLY as atrocious as I thought it was going to be.
"Nuclear Waste For Your Hazmat" - HERE
And, if you made it this far, there's one more to follow. Not gonna lie to you, the background music REALLY gets in the way of the lyrics, which I think are awesome. We are Audible Expletive; Uncle Salty and DJ Roar-T comin' atcha (my apologies for not remembering his actual alias). Don't think you've heard the last of us!
"You Can't Handle The Verity" - HERE
"Nuclear Waste For Your Hazmat" - HERE
And, if you made it this far, there's one more to follow. Not gonna lie to you, the background music REALLY gets in the way of the lyrics, which I think are awesome. We are Audible Expletive; Uncle Salty and DJ Roar-T comin' atcha (my apologies for not remembering his actual alias). Don't think you've heard the last of us!
"You Can't Handle The Verity" - HERE
Sunday, June 7, 2009
Podcast 6 - A Short Play In One Act
Entitled "Three's A Crowd", starring J.D. Taylor as the character You, The Hammer as the Police Officer, Bunnie as the Wife, and Steven A. Taylor as the character Me.
Written, Directed, and Executive Produced by Steven A. Taylor. Produced by J.D. Taylor, The Hammer, and Bunnie. Director's Assistants: The Hammer & Bunnie. Key Grip: J.D. Taylor.
Read the original manuscript HERE
Listen to "Three's A Crowd" HERE
Written, Directed, and Executive Produced by Steven A. Taylor. Produced by J.D. Taylor, The Hammer, and Bunnie. Director's Assistants: The Hammer & Bunnie. Key Grip: J.D. Taylor.
Read the original manuscript HERE
Listen to "Three's A Crowd" HERE
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Podcast 5 - Storytelling
Jake and I create an epic, once-in-a-lifetime superhero story from scratch. With minimal commercial interruption, in three parts one part, the track listing:
Download HERE
Test Test Test
Sandpaper Hands Man
60 Grit vs. 120 Grit
That's Like Smooth Boobs
Smooth Things Out Against Their Will
Our Deck Is Not Sanded To My Smoothness Preferences!
NC-17 Comic Book
He Could Be A Sandpaper MAN
Gritted For Her Pleasure
Kirby's Dreamhouse
God's Not A Comic Book Guy!
Constant Air-Blast Man
I Like Flaming Man
Pew, Fire! Pew, Fire!
Hobbits Can Be Flamers Too
Frodo's Cockring
What About Hairy Man?
20 Inches Long - BOOM - Soulpatch
Radio Jazzhands
Radio Jazzhands With More Zazz
I Like Hairy Man
Your Gooch Is Like 10 Feet Long
When We Come Back - The Official Story: Harry Hairman Vs. Sandpaper Man
Commercial Break:
State Lottery Commercial - Rub A Winner Out
Lord Of The Rings Tampons
Back to the Show:
It Was A Dark & Stormy Night ...
How Can I Make The City ... Hairy For Everybody?
Dammit, they want their hair CUT!
Two Hours Later ...
How Can I Fight This Hairy Crime Lady Phenomenon?
I'm Getting Hairy EVERYWHERE!
A Fate Of Hairy Nipples vs. Maid MmmHAIRian
Getting It On With Chicks: Helping Sandpapermankind
Not Just Wood, But Personal Issues
In The End, We All Win: We're smooth where we want to be, we're hairy where we want to be
The Greatest Superhero Story Ever Invented
Some More Radio Jazzhands
More Radio Zazzhands
Outro: Rub One Out For Major Tom
Download HERE
Test Test Test
Sandpaper Hands Man
60 Grit vs. 120 Grit
That's Like Smooth Boobs
Smooth Things Out Against Their Will
Our Deck Is Not Sanded To My Smoothness Preferences!
NC-17 Comic Book
He Could Be A Sandpaper MAN
Gritted For Her Pleasure
Kirby's Dreamhouse
God's Not A Comic Book Guy!
Constant Air-Blast Man
I Like Flaming Man
Pew, Fire! Pew, Fire!
Hobbits Can Be Flamers Too
Frodo's Cockring
What About Hairy Man?
20 Inches Long - BOOM - Soulpatch
Radio Jazzhands
Radio Jazzhands With More Zazz
I Like Hairy Man
Your Gooch Is Like 10 Feet Long
When We Come Back - The Official Story: Harry Hairman Vs. Sandpaper Man
Commercial Break:
State Lottery Commercial - Rub A Winner Out
Lord Of The Rings Tampons
Back to the Show:
It Was A Dark & Stormy Night ...
How Can I Make The City ... Hairy For Everybody?
Dammit, they want their hair CUT!
Two Hours Later ...
How Can I Fight This Hairy Crime Lady Phenomenon?
I'm Getting Hairy EVERYWHERE!
A Fate Of Hairy Nipples vs. Maid MmmHAIRian
Getting It On With Chicks: Helping Sandpapermankind
Not Just Wood, But Personal Issues
In The End, We All Win: We're smooth where we want to be, we're hairy where we want to be
The Greatest Superhero Story Ever Invented
Some More Radio Jazzhands
More Radio Zazzhands
Outro: Rub One Out For Major Tom
Saturday, April 4, 2009
Podcast 3 - Necessary Debates with J.D. Taylor
The people demanded and we acquiesced: More Hammer! Throughout this supersized podcast, The Hammer threw out topics that my brother and I were forced to debate. If one was pro, the other had to argue the con and vice versa. And a Bunnie for free ...
InTwo Parts One Part, The Track Listing:
Download HERE
1 - It's The Hammer, Dude!
2 - Small Wine Country
3 - If You Can Drive, You Can Drink!
4 - Ball Cancer, Why Would You Want That?
5 - There's No Rebuttals In This Shit
6 - If You Smoke One Cigarette You're Going To Get Lung Cancer
7 - 8 Fucking Delinquents
8 - We Need More Americans Infiltrating These Countries
9 - Dead Air!
10 - Wheat Farmers: They're America's Homegrown, You Know, Everybody
11 - Fuck The Rain, Let's Go
12 - I do not go out on the street and shoot babies in the face, okay?
13 - It's Got A Shell, It's A Fuckin' Shellfish
14 - A Fat Woman Plus A Normal Guy
15 - Fat People Are Not A Race!
16 - Money Should Be Grown On Trees & Borrowed From Chinese
17 - I Sandbag Pretty Good
18 - Dead Air!
19 - The Old Camping Spot Is Awesome
20 - Dead Air!
21 - Cats Suck Dick
22 - Pitbulls Are Bullshit
23 - What Do You Call A White Man Surrounded By 10 Indians?
24 - Are These Hindus?
25 - Hammer, Dead Air!
26 - DEAD AIR!
27 - This Is Tanking Horribly
28 - More Cushion For The Pushin' Is My Motto & A Half
29 - Top Ramen Does Not Color Your Teeth Very Well
30 - Drinking Boots Is A Test Of Manhood
31 - Super Mario Dead Air!
32 - B. You Don't Need A Vagina To Drink Regular Beer
33 - Dead Air!
34 - You For Lesbiam or Against It?
35 - Dead. Air.
36 - Porno Is Very Instructive
37 - I am awesome and it's my birthday and I am awesome
38 - Dead Air!
39 - Podcast Number Three, Comin' At Ya!
In
Download HERE
1 - It's The Hammer, Dude!
2 - Small Wine Country
3 - If You Can Drive, You Can Drink!
4 - Ball Cancer, Why Would You Want That?
5 - There's No Rebuttals In This Shit
6 - If You Smoke One Cigarette You're Going To Get Lung Cancer
7 - 8 Fucking Delinquents
8 - We Need More Americans Infiltrating These Countries
9 - Dead Air!
10 - Wheat Farmers: They're America's Homegrown, You Know, Everybody
11 - Fuck The Rain, Let's Go
12 - I do not go out on the street and shoot babies in the face, okay?
13 - It's Got A Shell, It's A Fuckin' Shellfish
14 - A Fat Woman Plus A Normal Guy
15 - Fat People Are Not A Race!
16 - Money Should Be Grown On Trees & Borrowed From Chinese
17 - I Sandbag Pretty Good
18 - Dead Air!
19 - The Old Camping Spot Is Awesome
20 - Dead Air!
21 - Cats Suck Dick
22 - Pitbulls Are Bullshit
23 - What Do You Call A White Man Surrounded By 10 Indians?
24 - Are These Hindus?
25 - Hammer, Dead Air!
26 - DEAD AIR!
27 - This Is Tanking Horribly
28 - More Cushion For The Pushin' Is My Motto & A Half
29 - Top Ramen Does Not Color Your Teeth Very Well
30 - Drinking Boots Is A Test Of Manhood
31 - Super Mario Dead Air!
32 - B. You Don't Need A Vagina To Drink Regular Beer
33 - Dead Air!
34 - You For Lesbiam or Against It?
35 - Dead. Air.
36 - Porno Is Very Instructive
37 - I am awesome and it's my birthday and I am awesome
38 - Dead Air!
39 - Podcast Number Three, Comin' At Ya!
Monday, February 2, 2009
Podcast 2 - More Politics With J.D. Taylor
What do Christopher Columbus, General Custer, Female Volleyball Players, and Elvis have in common? Stick around for The Wisdom Of The Hammer to find out. And a Bunnie for free ...
HERE
HERE
Sunday, September 14, 2008
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